New Math

The surprise 40th birthday party for my "straight boyfriend" Garth was a smashing success. We caught him completely off guard. We met for a drink and were heading to this amazing place downtown when my best friend UberKen called in the midst of a family crisis. We agreed to stop off for a few minutes and have a drink with him. Of course, that's where the party was assembled and that was my "all aboard" cue.

The rambling old Tudor house was completely awash in lights. The leaded glass windows danced in reflection. It looked simply magical. UberKen was outside in the driveway screaming into the cell phone and told us to go inside. I stepped back at the door and allowed Garth to enter first. He walked in and ran head first into his parents (secretly flown in), our friends, and a great surprise party. He was absolutely stunned.

We were limited to twelve by the number of seats in the dining room. And what a room it was. Seventy five yards of fabric draped the ceiling in a sunburst pattern overhead and set the standard for the rest of the room. Linens and sparkling stemware were newly purchased and being inaugurated. There were good friends, sumptuous food, animated conversation, and more than a few bottles of a good red wine.

After the dinner plates were cleared, they brought out an enormous chocolate cake with numeric candles spelling out 1-0-0-0. Garth's mother, Wanda, looked at me perplexed and asked, "Why does the cake say a thousand?" "It's how we count in Hollywood", I explained. "Thirty-seven, thirty-eight, thirty-nine, ......a thousand". I gave her the slice with the number one.